AN Forums

Some Little Funnies


#1562

365 Stupidest Things Ever Said Page-A-Day Calendar

October 19, 2018

  • Intestinal Breakfast
  • Fat Slug mixed with Onion
  • Baked backwash with mushrooms

menu items from the US and China


#1563

365 Stupidest Things Ever Said Page-A-Day Calendar

October 20, 2018

POLICE ADMIT “BIGGEST-EVER” COCAINE HAUL IS DENTAL POWDER

  • headline, Express & Echo (UK)

#1564

365 Stupidest Things Ever Said Page-A-Day Calendar

October 22, 2018

15 to 1 host Sandi Toksvig: Which German word meaning “health” is an equivalent of the English expression “Bless you”, and is commonly said to a person who has just sneezed?
Contestant: Achtung!


#1565

365 Stupidest Things Ever Said Page-A-Day Calendar

October 24, 2018

Northhampton Troopers Find 230 Bags or Heroin After Suspect Whispers, “I don’t think they found all the stuff in the car.”

  • headline, MassLive website

#1566

365 Stupidest Things Ever Said Page-A-Day Calendar

October 25, 2018

Judge: Do you know what the oath you have just taken means?
Defendant: Yeah. It means if I swear to a lie, I gotta stick to it.

  • actual courtroom testimony

#1567

365 Stupidest Things Ever Said Page-A-Day Calendar

October 29, 2018

In a moment we will have an interview with the great-great-great-granddaughter of Moby Dick.

  • broadcaster Martha Keaney

#1568

365 Stupidest Things Ever Said Page-A-Day Calendar

November 6, 2018

Win the yes needs the no to win against the no.

  • French Prime Minister Jean-Pierre Raffarin on the referendum for the European constitution, urging for the “yes” party to vote to debate the “no” party

#1569

#1570

365 Stupidest Things Ever Said Page-A-Day Calendar

November 10, 2018

The older you get, you understand. You really don’t understand it, you accept it.

  • University of Illinois football coach Bill Cubit, regarding the dismissal of Illinois’s athletic director

#1571

365 Stupidest Things Ever Said Page-A-Day Calendar

November 13, 2018

Fox News host Steve Doocy (to his cohosts): And I just told [Brian Kilmeade] that he’s got to try the loose meat sandwich, which is an Iowa tradition. It’s like a sloppy joe with no tomato sauce.
Fox News host Brian Kilmeade: And I told you I like my meat tight.
Doocy: What?!?
Kilmeade: Not loose. Tighten up my meat!


#1572

The perils of being on-air. :zipper_mouth_face:


#1573

365 Stupidest Things Ever Said Page-A-Day Calendar

November 18, 2018

RCMP received a report alleging high-pitched screams were coming from inside a residence. Police arrived at the location and a woman inside the residence advised she had been singing.

  • police report, The Westerly News (Ucluelet, BC)

#1574

365 Stupidest Things Ever Said Page-A-Day Calendar

November 19, 2018

According to Trooper Hughes, Brent was driving eastbound on Route 22 when a deer entered the roadway from the north berm. The deer jumped onto the vehicle, causing damage to the windshield and left side of the vehicle. Hughes reported that the deer was deceased and that, “The name of the deer was not disclosed until family members were notified.”

  • police blotter item in a Pennsylvania newspaper

#1575

Shoenbill_NoSecondThanksgivingSM


#1576

365 Stupidest Things Ever Said Page-A-Day Calendar

November 22, 2018

HOW TO PREPARE PETS FOR THANKSGIVING

  • headline on a column, Cincinnati Community Press

#1577

Yummy! :rofl:


#1578

Remember Punctuation saves lives!

For Example

Let’s Eat Grandma!

&

Let’s eat, Grandma!

Are 2 entirely different things…


#1579

please-stand-clear-of-the-closing-doors-adamtots-we-are-28398678


#1580

365 Stupidest Things Ever Said Page-A-Day Calendar

November 24, 2018

They’ve won fifteen of their last eight games.

  • sportscaster Chris Myers on the Arizona Cardinals

#1581

365 Stupidest Things Ever Said Page-A-Day Calendar

November 27, 2018

Moist wipes for wiping splotch and peculiar smell

  • label on personal wipes, China